I think I have to get over being stubborn and competitive. I feel really bad that I have nothing to contribute to my group that they don’t already know, so I compensate by spending inordinate amounts of time digging up journals and such just so I have something to say. Its taking up way too much time.

I think it goes back to my time as a performer. I never was the most naturally talented, but I made it through stubborness and competitiveness.  I would pick people who were superb and use them as a benchmark across various skills. So now I’m pitting myself against physios and Phd holders in biochemistry.  No wonder I feel like I’m going under.