It can be hard, hearing the heroic tales of other students – people have done microsurgery, inserted chest drains, drilled burr holes, performed caesarians, diagnosed rare and improbable diseases, saved lives, and its really hard not to compare your journey with theirs.
But its nice to remember to celebrate the small things and after the tragedy of last week so I will indulge a little.
As part of our training we have to do a psychiatric interview with a new patient, in front of our boss/consultant/attending. It’s a bit theatre, a bit blood sport as my consultant is notorious for destroying all within her path, once archily stating ‘ I hope your interview today is not reflective of your global incompetance in medicine’. And she had been on a warpath this day, with one fellow student already succumbing earlier in the day. Needless to say, expectation was high for my turn. And I nailed it. It was smooth, and ‘sophisticated’ (her words) and I ‘warmed the cockles of her heart’. BOoya.
I still dont like psych, but hey I’ll take what I can.

My patient (who is dying) is back in hospital. We never managed to have the family meeting where we would discuss his options for dying as the weather prevented them from making it up from their property so it had been decided to have a phone conference. And he asked for me to be there because he felt that I understood him. Which just floored me and humbled me, he’s a -60something indigenous man, with metastisised cancers, end stage renal failure, fought and won his land rights, and raised an enormous, lovely family, who has lived through things I can’t even imagine. I know nothing, I can do nothing but he wanted me there, to talk to his family about his dying.

So small things, quiet things, but they are meaningful to me, and hell I’ll take whatever I can get to keep myself going!

PS
The Silver Rose, a ballet I worked on originally in Germany opened in Brisbane with its new custodians The Australian Ballet. I unfortunately was unable to be there (again) but I hear it went great so I’m pleased.
go see it!

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